Akatsuki in JAIL!
by Inkcaster
Summary: What happens when the Akatsuki gets stuck in the Konohagakure jail? And what happens when Deidara has to share his cell with the most annoying member of them all....Tobi?....please read and comment!
1. Jail with Tobi?

Tobi looked around. He was in a cell with Deidara, in the Konohagakure jail.  
Kisame and Itachi shared the cell in front of them, and Kakuzu and Hidan had the cell to their right. Konan and Pein shared the cell on the left of of Kisame's, and Zetsu had the cell to his (Tobi's) left. They were all stuck in jail, because Zetsu had been too careless on their last mission.  
Deidara sat, staring out the small window in his cell. Tobi pestered him again.  
"Ugh, they could have put him with Zetsu, yeah?" he thought. He looked over at Kisame and Itachi.  
Kisame sat, staring at the purple nail polish on his toes. Itachi stared at his fingernails. Kisame sighed,"They HAD to take Samehada, hrm"  
Itachi nodded,"They're not stupid Kisame"  
"When we get out, can I cut a few of them up?" Kisame chuckled.  
"Hrm...funny."was all Itachi could say. He looked at Kisame, then went back to admiring the fingernails he couldn't see.  
Zetsu sat, looking over in Kisame and Itachi's cell.  
"I'm hungry. Anyone willing to be my lunch?"he asked.  
"Eat me and you die."sighed Itachi. Zetsu looked longingly at Kisame.  
"But I'm HUUUNNNGGRRYY...Fishy"  
"NO!!"screamed Kisame, reaching for his sword."AGH!! THEY TOOK IT"  
Pein woke up.  
"Koonnaann??"he whined.  
"Yeah?"she responded "Can you tell them to stop being idiots, and tell Zetsu that if he can eat through the bars, he can eat the OTHER prisoners"  
Zetsu ran to the bars, and viciously started to gnaw at them.  
Deidara sighed,"The bars are..." Just then Zetsu felt a few thousand volts of electricity go through him. "electrified with 7,000 volts...yeah? Uh...Eating them is not the greatest idea." Tobi slowly walked torwards the cell bars.  
"Dei-senpai, are they really electrified?"he asked.  
"Yes...uh...no Tobi, no they're not...feel free to poke them."he responded with a sinister grin. Tobi poked the bars. His hair stood up on its ends, and he fell to the floor.  
"Uh...I thought the bars werent electrifried...oh... my head" wined Tobi.  
"Heh...I heard the thump. That was Tobi, I presume, being an idiot" Hidan chuckled.  
Kakuzu looked up from his knitting."Cool" he remarked, too busy to indulge in a conversation, then went back to his knitting. Deidara got up, and started kicking at Tobi.  
"Hrmm...Deidara? Why are you kicking me? Tobi's a good boy...hey...ow..." remarked Tobi.  
Deidara laughed, and said,"I'm enjoying the opportunity given, yeah"  
Tobi winced."Owie, you kicked me on my side. Eh...ow! Let me get up...please"  
Deidara just laughed harder."No. I'm actually enjoying this"  
Tobi yelled,"Eehh...Deidara!! Stop!! Pein-san tell her to stop kicking me"  
Deidara fumed."I AM NOT A GIRL!!"He shrieked, and started to kick poor Tobi harder.  
Tobi started to cry."What did I say??"he asked while fighting back Deidara's foot.  
Pein started to get annoyed."Deidara, stop that. Tobi, Deidara is a guy...I thought we told you already"  
"But she...he...Deidara senpai is too pretty to be a guy!" Tobi sighed, causing him to be kicked again.

and so chapter one ends...i'd like to thank my buddies on gaia, for supporting the rp version of the story (which turned out different, and poor Tobi was spared the awful kicking...(yet almost left, for they have just escaped) but yeah...please comment and if you are one of my loyal fans, your username is mentioned below

Dont-stop-believing ...

Feel special if you are on this list

many thanks to Tskyli :)

comment or else I will get one of my friends to come eat ALL of your cookies...or maybe I'll send grunnies after you or something...I haven't decided yet.


	2. Morning Risings

Tobi woke up to a small glinse of sunlight coming through barred windows. yawning, he rubbed his eyes. He stood up from the floor where he was forced to sleep last night and put on his mask. He walked over to the window and looked outside. Water surrounded the small island that Konohakagure jail was on. He longed to be outside and free. Then, he looked away.  
Itachi looked over and saw Tobi standing in his cell, humming. Itachi chuckled at his childishness. He wasn't able to sleep the night before, even though he had the bed. He crawled off the bed.  
"OW! GetoffME!" someone shrieked. Itachi looked down and saw that he was standing on Kisame. Kisame grabbed Itachi's leg, and tripped him. Then, he slowly got up, aching, and brushed himself off. Then he nudged Itachi with his foot. Itachi groaned, rubbing his head. Itachi got up, and sat on the bed again.  
Zetzu was hungry. The jail guards hadn't dared get near his cell, for fear of their lives. His stomach groaned in starvation. Then he looked at the wall and wondered how cement tasted like.  
A devilish grin spread across his face. He paced, having nothing better to do. Then, his stomach screamed for food. Griping his cloak, Zetzu started to walk toward the wall.  
Pein stretched, the bright sun as far away from his cell as it could to him. He pulled himself off the floor and rubbed the back of his head. "Spiders" he thought as he felt a small bite on his neck. He shook the bundle on the bed next to him. A small whine came from the sheets.  
He chuckled; Konan was not a morning person. Bending down, he picked up a flare red flower from the ground. Laughing to himself, he stuck it in his hair. "Hey...Konan! Look, doesn't this look work on me"  
Konan grumbled and pulled the bedsheet off her shiny blue hair. "Pein what do yo- what you doing? You look like an idiot!" she covered her face, not wanting to show how funny she actually thought it was. Once she calmed herself down, she gently plucked the flower from his orange hair. She stuck it in her own, saying, "It looks better on me." Then she remembered. "Oh...great.  
Today we eat in the cafeteria...ALL of us." she said, looking over at Zetsu, who was trying to decide where to bite first on the wall. His ears perked up.  
"ALL of us?" he sneered. He walked away from the wall and sat on the bed, counting the seconds. Then, he thought..."Wait...All of us means other people too...why eat the food then?" He was shaking on the bed in excitement.  
Kakuzu was sewing his arm back on; a rat had enjoyed chewing on it last night. He bit the string, and put it in his pocket. Hidan sat in the corner of the room, murmuring to himself.  
"Busy..." he thought, and looked out his cell and saw Zetsu apparently very excited, squirming in his cell. He sighed, and looked over at what he could see of Tobi and Deidara. Tobi fumbled with his mask, and Deidara...slept.  
Deidara squirmed in his blanket, having great hallucinations of torturing Tobi. He was thinking about just blowing him up...but that wasn't complicated enough. Yet...it was Tobi. Who cared how complicated it was? He shuffled in the bed, and Tobi could hear him yelling, "BAM BAM KAPYEW!  
HAHAHA!! POOOOOSSSSHHHH!!" Tobi crammed himself against the wall. Suddenly, someone walked in, with a triangle in his hand.  
"Lunch!" He declared, pinging the instrument. 


	3. Eggs for Lunch

A loud laughter resounded from Zetzu's cage, "Yes! FINALLY!" he screamed. The guard started to back away a little, and turned to release Itachi and Kisame first. Yet, he grew scared of Kisame as well, and was frightened until he got to the cell where Deidara and Tobi sat. As he started to turn the key, Tobi realized Deidara was still sleeping, so he decided to wake him. Tobi grabbed Deidara's shoulders and started to shake him vigorously, saying, "Dei-chan it's lunch time! Someone as prett-" Suddenly Deidara's arm shot out from under the covers and pulled Tobi's mask off, ripping the string. Tobi gasped as Deidara put the mask in his Tobi's hand, whispering, "Guys aren't pretty...idiot!" He stormed away and out of the cell, noticing how hungry he really was. Tobi quietly followed, pressing his mask to his face as if that would fix it.

Itachi was upset now, why should he skip lunch due to some guard's fears? "Hey you" he growled to the guard. "I look normal, so let me out!"

Kisame walked up to Itachi and murmured, "But, I'm hungry too!" Itachi just turned and winked, and Kisame knew what he was going to do. What idiot would let an Akatsuki member who had skills that didn't involve weapons out? _Apparently this guard_. he thought as the cell door slammed open. Itachi quickly pinned him against the wall, and not even a minute after, the guard slid to the floor, twitching as if he were siezing. Tobi ran and grabbed the keys with one hand, while holding his mask to his face with the other. He ran to Konan and Pein's cell and started to fumble with the key in the slot. Konan just sat and stared at him, while Pein...did the same actually. They both glared at Tobi until finally, he opened the cell. Pein cheered while Tobi just stood there, astounded that he actually unlocked the door. He took off his mask and shone a giddy smile as he skipped to Hidan and Kakuzu's cell and quickly did the same. Suddenly as he was going to the last cell, he stopped, and pulled Kakuzu over.

"Kakuzu I'm scared of Zetsu, can you unlock the door?" he asked as he handed the keys. Kakuzu nodded as he walked to the cell and quickly opened it. Zetzu ran out and grabbed the guard.

"Can I eat him??" Zetsu asked. Pein nodded and ignored the crunching sounds as he walked away. Tobi just stared at the guard being demolished until Deidara realized that he was traumatized and pulled him away. Tobi blinked a few times, shuddered, and held on to Deidara in fear of being eaten next. Deidara was too busy thinking of other things to care. _Tobi is so easy to scare! How did he get in the Akatsuki anyway?_ he pondered, until they reached the lunchall.

It was filled with hundreds of misicule criminals, people any one of the Akatsuki could kill, except Tobi, probably, who's eyes grew wide as he tightened his grip on Deidara's cloak. "Tobi, you can let go." he muttered, as he pushed Tobi away. Tobi insisted on holding Deidara's hand, no matter how many times he tried to shake him off. _The trauma must be getting to him._ he thought, as they found an empty bench nearby. As they got their food and sat down, Tobi still refused to let go. Deidara found this annoying, as he couldn't grab the fork. "Tobi!" he yelled in frustration. Tobi stared at him with child-like eyes and let go, slowly. Then he just stared and poked at his food, too scared to eat it. Deidara scoffed, and cut up all of his food before eating it. Then, Tobi saw what he was doing, and quickly snatched his hand again.

"Thanks Deichan!" he smiled. Deidara just rolled his eyes, and noticed that Tobi still wasn't eating.

"Why are you not eating your food Tobi?" he asked.

"Because I can't hold my fork! I'm too scared to let go!' Tobi whined. Deidara pinned the eggs to the plate as Tobi cut them, then ate them vigorously. _Woah he was hungry! _was all Deidara could think.


End file.
